Who's Right?Adult child living at home: should they pay rent?
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In short
Nothing forces them to, but once they have a steady income, chipping in for household costs is fair and healthy. The amount should stay reasonable and take their plans into account, such as saving to move out.
Both sides
Théo is 23 and he has just signed his first proper job contract. I asked him for €300 a month, which isn't even half the price of a studio around here. Groceries, electricity, water: everything has gone up, and he eats more than the two of us put together. I'm not kicking him out, I just want him to understand that having a roof over your head costs money.
I take home €1,600 and I save almost all of it for the deposit and first months of my own flat. If I hand over €300 every month, I'll move out a year later, which is exactly what my mum doesn't want. I already do the Saturday shopping and look after the garden. It feels unfair to be treated like a tenant in my own home.
The verdict
Nadia is right in principle: once you earn a regular salary, contributing to household costs is normal. It eases the family budget and prepares you for independent life, where every month starts with bills.
But Théo makes a fair point: his savings serve a goal everyone shares, him moving out. Too high a sum slows that plan down, and the help he already gives around the house deserves to count.
The real issue is that the amount was set without discussing it. A contribution based on what Théo actually costs the household, rather than on market rent, would be fairer for both.
The compromise
Théo pays €150 a month towards food and energy, and keeps doing the Saturday shopping and the garden. They agree together on a target move-out date and review things in six months.
Who do you think is right?
Pick a side.
Frequently asked questions
How much should you ask an adult child living at home to pay?
There's no perfect figure. A good starting point is what they really cost the household (food, energy, water) rather than market rent. A modest share of their salary, agreed together, usually goes down better.
What if they are a student or out of work?
Then asking for money makes little sense. You can, however, expect real help with household chores, and a small contribution if they have a part-time job.
Can chores replace part of the money?
Yes, as long as they are regular and clearly defined: shopping, cooking, cleaning, odd jobs. This stops one person feeling they pay while the other does more.
Can parents save the money and give it back later?
Many families like this approach. The child gets used to paying every month, and the parent returns all or part of it when they move out.
How do you bring it up without upsetting them?
Pick a calm moment, share the household figures and ask what they would suggest. Talking about a "contribution" rather than "rent" often helps keep things friendly.
Guide Family disputes: the guide
Written with the help of AI, reviewed by the Who's Right team · This is not legal advice. How Who's Right decides
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