Who's Right?Should couples split costs 50/50 on unequal incomes?
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In short
Not necessarily: a 50/50 split weighs much more heavily on the partner who earns less. Many couples prefer to share joint costs in proportion to their incomes, and each keeps a personal budget.
Both sides
I earn €1,700 a month, and Thomas makes almost twice that. Since we moved in together, we've split everything down the middle: rent, groceries, holidays. By the end of the month, I have almost nothing left, while he saves without even thinking about it. I'm not asking him to pay for me. I just want us to share costs based on what each of us earns.
To me, 50/50 is the simplest and fairest way: we live in the same flat and eat the same food. I don't want money to create an imbalance or make either of us feel we owe the other. I work hard for what I earn, and I have my own plans too. If Inès is short, I'd rather treat her now and then than change all the rules.
The verdict
A 50/50 split looks fair, but only on the surface. With €1,200 rent split in half, Inès spends about 35% of her salary on it, and Thomas about 19%. Over time, the gap in savings grows, and the same person always ends up going without. Inès makes a strong point: she isn't asking to be supported, she's asking for a comparable effort.
Thomas is right about two things: money shouldn't create dependence, and each partner needs room for their own plans. But treating Inès now and then turns a fair split into a favour. That creates exactly the feeling of owing something that he wants to avoid.
The issue is the method, not the intentions. Splitting costs in proportion to income meets both Inès's need for fairness and Thomas's need for independence.
The compromise
Sit down together with both your take-home pay and a list of shared costs (rent, bills, groceries). Each month, each of you pays into a shared account a share proportional to your income, here roughly 35% for Inès and 65% for Thomas. Each of you keeps the rest, no explanations needed.
Who do you think is right?
Pick a side.
Frequently asked questions
How do you split costs in proportion to income?
Add up both take-home salaries, then divide each salary by that total. That gives the percentage of shared costs each person pays. With €1,700 and €3,200, that's roughly 35% and 65%.
Do we need a joint account to share expenses?
It isn't essential, but it's handy: each of you transfers your share every month, and shared bills are paid from there. Personal spending stays in each person's own account.
Which expenses should be shared?
Usually housing, bills, groceries, and often costs for children or pets. Holidays and outings can follow the same rule or be decided case by case. The key is to agree before spending.
What if the income gap changes?
Redo the calculation whenever one of you changes jobs, goes part-time or loses income. A yearly check-in stops resentment from building up.
Can a 50/50 split still work?
Yes, when incomes are close or when both partners are genuinely comfortable with it. The rule itself isn't the problem. The problem is when it puts one partner under strain.
Guide Couple disputes: the guide
Written with the help of AI, reviewed by the Who's Right team · This is not legal advice. How Who's Right decides
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